using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize