i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
