But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I need to calm my uterus...
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
This toilet bowl is my home.
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