I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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