Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
