After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
