yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
