I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
