I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
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