is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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