return my video game
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Randomize
