She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
