I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize
