xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
