She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize