I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
That accounts for only three of the penises
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
