Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
