We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
