I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize