fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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