Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
