it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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