She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
