I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Randomize
