So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
is it fun? or sober?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize