if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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