Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
