drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
do nipples grow back?
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