I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Randomize