if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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