I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
