How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
