She even gives head with a lisp.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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