people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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