something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
