Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
