I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Brb crying the tears of my youth
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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