my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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