i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
