he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize