I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
we should paint friendship bongs
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