are you so shy because you have an std?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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