my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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