just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
