I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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