I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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