Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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