But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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