Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
