I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
